Today We're Thinkin' About
by TheBreakfastClubberMyself
Summary: What's on the minds of the Degrassi kids? Read my story and see. Chapter 11 is now up. JT's POV pt. 2 next. Sneak Preview of it: I laughed. "Emma, what happened to your hair"
1. Manny: I Won't Move, I Won't Breathe

**DISCLAIMER: SADLY, I DON'T OWN DEGRASSI OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NOR DO I OWN THE SONG "SWEETEST SIN" JESSICA SIMPSON OWNS THAT.**

_**Summary: The point of view from Degrassi students, on sex, drugs, life, relationships, stuff like that. Slightly AU, I changed the story a bit, to make it more appealing in my own way.**_

**(Manny's POV)**

I'm really upset. I don't know if my suspicions are right or not, but I think that I might be pregnant. Good Lord, how did this happen, you may ask. I'm only fourteen, frankly, I'm not one hundred percent positive. I'll tell my story from the beginning, because, even I am confused by what's going on.

Craig Manning is the kind of guy any girl could hope for. That's exactly how I felt, I wanted Craig, more then anything. I liked him for the longest time, but during that time he was dating Ashley Kerwin and I was just a little "grade 9." Now, Craig was in grade 10. Sure, a yearmay not seem like a big difference, but at Degrassi, it is. Not many people dated out of their own grades. It's like an unwritten rule or something. Well, I had my eyes out for Craig. I was sure there was some way I could get him to notice me. Some how. I was positive I could get him.

Being friends with Emma Nelson makes you seem like a sweet, innocent person, but inside, I knew I wasn't anything close to that. That's when I figured out how to get Craig, I would change. Overnight, I went from sweet, innocent Manny Santos to hot, desirable, sexy Manny Santos. I knew I was hot. The guys suddenly started coming around more. I even got looks from Grade 11's.

I was so excited, knowing that I was one step closer to getting my hands on Craig, and finally it happened, but secretly. He was still dating Ashley. So we had to keep it quiet. We had great times, but I knew that it was wrong, so at Christmas time I had to ask him to chose, either break up with Ashley or lose me. He said he couldn't do that, I started to walk away from him, but thankfully he stopped me. He told me that I was the one he wanted to be with. Later he said he and Ashley were done, over with. I believed him, but later I found out they were still dating, and Ashley found out that we were, too. That did it, Ashley and Craig were over with and so were Craig and I.

For days after that I sunk into this thing, it wasn't depression, but I definately wasn't myself. I partied a lot, having been invited by the older guys from grades 10 and 11. I started drinking, a lot, mainly at parties, but I did drink at home, too, if I could, only when my parents weren't home. Then, once, for no reason at all, I found myself at Craig's doorstep. I slowly lifted my shaking hand and tapped on the door. Craig answered the door. He looked even better then I remembered. He stepped out onto the porch and closed the door behind him. I walked over and sat on the porch swing. He sat down next to me and said, "Manny, what's going on?" I looked into his eyes and I saw the hurt. I grabbed his shirt collar and pulled him into a kiss, he kissed me back, it was a great kiss, one you never want to end. When it did end I looked up at him. "I made a mistake, Craig. I need you." I replied to his earlier comment. He kissed me again. It was great. I missed him. Now I had him back, but this time I didn't have to share.

After a long make out session on the porch he asked me, "You wanna come inside?" I wasn't sure. I hesitantly looked at him, then the door, then back at him. "What about Angie and Joey?" I questioned. He smiled sweetly and answered with, "They went to visit Joey's parents, I didn't feel like going, so I'm here... alone." I smiled back at him. I kissed him once more and then he lead me inside, to his bedroom. We stood there for a minute, until he leaned in and kissed me, again. I put my arms around his neck and he slowly guided me to the bed and gently laid me down. He continued to kiss me for a while, then started trailing kisses down my neck. I let out a small moan and he chuckled a little. "You like that?" he asked, but he already knew the answer. He continued kissing my neck. I felt his hands go under my shirt, I was hesitant at first, I moved my hands over his, signaling for him to stop, which he did, but we continued kissing. Then, I took his hands once more and lead them to my waist, telling him to do it now. He obeyed and soon my shirt was gone. I helped him remove his shirt, also. Once it was off I ran my hands down his stomach, this time he let out a moan. I giggled. Minutes later I felt him fiddling with my belt, he was having trouble so I helped him out. After the belt was successfully unbuckled he undid the button on my pants. He slowly slid them down and took them off. Once he was done with that he got up, which disappointed me, but he turned on the radio and came and "laid" back down on top of me, he wasn't exactly laying on me, he was holding himself over me with his arm. He started kissing me again. I was so happy, once he continued. I was getting really nervous, this was my first time, and as far as I knew, it was Craig's first time, too. Soon, we found ourselves naked and "making love" to Jessica Simpson's, "_The Sweetest Sin_." It was amazing. I didn't even think about what the date was.

Thanks to that mistake here I am, two months later, with no word from my monthly visitor. Craig and I have had a strong relationship in the past two months, only having or thinking about sex, that once. It was great to have him back. I started going to band practice and hanging out with Craig and his friends. We once went on a quadruple date, that was an experience, let me tell you. It had been Craig and I, Marco and Dylan, Spinner and Paige, and Jimmy and Ashley. Hazel had been out of town that week and Jimmy had called and asked her if it was alright if he and Ashley went together, not wanting to miss out on the fun. She reluctantly agreed, as long as they didn't kiss and they were with the rest of us, at all times. He was true to those conditions, but just the fact that Ashley was there was horrible. She kept giving me these looks, looks of hate, looks of jealousy, looks of fury.

Back to now... here I am, sitting in my room, eyes full of tears, part of me wanting to pick up the phone, part of me not wanting to. I slowly did and dialed the number so familiar to me. I heard a male voice on the other line... "Hello?" I answered the question with another, "Craig?" He then replied, "Manny?" I could hear a smile in his voice. Then I continued with no question in mine at all. "Yeah. Craig, we need to talk. It's important." He kindly said, "Okay, what is it?" I hesitantly chose my next words. "I think I might be- uh... pregnant." There was an awkward silence for a few minutes. He broke it with the words, "Are you sure?" I quietly told him, "No, but it's been two months." He sat on the other end, silent. Finally he piped up, "Why don't you go buy a test tomorrow, then come over here, Joey's working until 7:00 and Angie goes to a babysitter's until then, you can do it here, then we can both find out together." I shook my head, knowing that he could hear it I said, "Yeah. That'll be- um- okay." We hung up moments later, but before we did, he told me that no matter what, he loved me, that made me very happy. That night I fell into a restless, dreamless sleep. I woke up the next morning, still feeling as though I hadn't slept in days. I got up and got ready for school, dreading my after school activity.

Craig was amazing today. He didn't tell anyone about our situation, not even Spinner, Jimmy, or Marco, which I was thankful for. I didn't need any sympathy, well at least until we were positive. I had a growing suspicious that Ashley knew something was up. I just hoped she didn't know what. The day slid by slowly but finally the last bell rang and I headed to my locker, quickly. To my disappointment, Emma was already there. I didn't need this, not now. I walked up to my locker and opened it. Emma looked at me suspiciously. "Uh, hello. What's the matter with you?" she questioned. I replied in a harsh tone, "Look, I can't talk about it _now_, I'll tell you tomorrow. Okay?" Emma looked taken aback by my tone, and simply nodded and walked off without another word. I slowly threw my books into my bag and walked to the drugstore. I hastily grabbed a pregnancy test and paid for it quickly. I shoved the paper bag into my book bag and ran to Craig's house. I knocked and he opened it immediately. I went inside and he lead me to the bathroom. I went in and read the box, I did what the directions said and then came out of the bathroom, Craig was sitting against the wall, across from the bathroom. He stood up when he saw me. "Well?" he questioned. "We have to wait fifteen minutes." I stated. He went and set a timer. I impatiently waited for a little ding. I finally heard it and we went into the bathroom. We hovered over the test and a tear rolled down my cheek. It was negitive. I looked at Craig and he looked at me. I could see the relief in his eyes. We exited the bathroom and I jumped into his arms and kissed him. I'd never been so happy in my life. Craig and I wandered into the living room and turned on the TV. We started to make out, but went no farther then that, both knowing this scared the hell out of us. We knew we wouldn't be having sex again for quite awhile.   
  
**Hope you like it! Please R&R. This is my first Degrassi fic, so I need the input. Thanks, ...Shelby... **

**Up next- it's going to be Craig's POV. Then chapter three is going to be either Spinner or Paige, you decide, tell me.**


	2. Craig: Til You Finally See

**DISCLAIMER: DON'T OWN DEGRASSI OR THE CHARACTERS.**  
  
_Recap: Manny and Craig got back together and had a pregnancy scare. Manny's POV.  
_  
**(Craig's POV)**  
  
So much has happened in the past two months it's almost confusing. After breaking up with both her and Ashley, Manny and I got back together. She showed up at my house one night, out of the blue. We started kissing, which lead to making out, which, since Joey and Angie weren't home, lead to my bedroom, where we, uh- had sex. It was amazing. I knew that night that I loved Manny. Wow! I just said that I loved her... I've never loved anyone other then family... but I do love Manny. Okay, now fast forwawrd to the present time.  
  
Last night Manny called me, she told me she thought that she might be pregnant. I was shocked. I knew that we hadn't been safe at all, which was a BIG mistake, we didn't use a condom and she didn't use any birth control. As shocked as I was I told her to come over today, after school and she could do a pregnancy test. Now, here I am, sitting against the wall, across from the bathroom, while she's in there doing the test. I had my head on my knees. I finally heard the door unclick and I looked up. "Well?" I asked. "We have to wait fifteen minutes," she informed me. I went and set the timer on the fridge. We waited impatiently for the little ding. Finally, we heard it. We walked into the bathroom and hovered over the test. I looked down. It revealed that she wasn't pregnant. I heard the "Hallelujiah" chorus singing in my head. She looked up at me and I looked at her. There was a tear rolling down her cheek. I took her face into my hands and wiped it away. We walked out of the bathroom and she jumped into my arms. She started kissing me. I kissed her back. We just stood there for awhile, Manny in my arms, with her legs wrapped around my waist, kissing. After awhile she jumped down and we walked into the living room. I flicked on the TV and we sat down. Soon we started kissing. At 6:00 Manny announced that she should leave. I walked her to the front door and kissed her one last time, then she was gone.  
  
I still had and hour before Ang and Joey were home so I went back into the living room and flipped through the channels. There was nothing on, so I gave up on the idea of TV. I went upstairs to my room and turned on the stereo. I laid down on my bed and must have fallen asleep because the next thing I remember was Joey yelling up the stairs that he was home. I pulled myself up and went downstairs. "Where's Ang?" I questioned. "She stayed with my sister," he answered. I muttered, "Oh." and walked into the kitchen.  
  
As I was digging through the fridge I heard the bathroom door close. Then I heard Joey yell, "CRAIG!" I automatically knew why he was yelling, both Manny and I, in our state of happiness had forgotten to throw the pregnancy test away. Joey stomped into the kitchen, test in hand. "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" he screamed. I looked down at the floor. "It was a- a friend. She was worried. I had to help her." I lied. "DON'T LIE TO ME, CRAIG." Joey yelled. "Okay, it was Manny's. Sh- she wasn't sure. W- we needed to check." I told him, this time telling the truth. He looked at me. "You guys- you uh...?" he stammered. "Yes." I replied, knowing what he was asking. That night Joey and I had a long talk... okay, lecture, more, about sex and the consequences. It was pretty embarassing that my step father knew that my girlfriend and I had had sex.  
  
The next day I called Manny. "Hello?" she answered. "Hey." I replied. "Hi. What's up?" she asked. "He found it." I informed her. "Wait, who found what?" she questioned. "Joey, he found the test." I said. "Oh, shit." she whispered. "Look it's okay. He just yelled at me for awhile, then he lectured me, it's okay." I tried to assure her. "But, Craig, what if he tells some one?" she asked, worriedly. " I asked him not to, he said he wouldn't." I assured her. "I'm just worried." she said. "I know, so am I." I told her. "Nobody else knows, do they?" she asked. "Only Joey, you, and me." I assured her. "And Emma." she informed me. "You yold her?" I asked, embarassed. "Well, she called and asked why I was in such a bad mood, I just had to tell her." she whined. "That's fine, but just, whatever you do, don't let Spinner or Paige find out... Paige likes to gossip and Spinner just can't keep his mouth shut." I laughed. She did too. "AND, not a word to Ashley about it either... God knows she won't keep it a secret." I didn't say anything. I hadn't thought about Ashley, I knew there was no way she'd keep it a secret if she found out. We got off the phone and I started to get ready for school. Once I was done I headed out the door and to Degrassi Community School.  
  
Once there I went and found my friends. Spinner was standing with his arm around Paige's waist and Jimmy was there with Hazel, where Marco was, I didn't know. I walked over to them. "What's up?" I greeted them, as always. "I was going to ask you the same thing." Spinner said. "What's wrong?" I asked. "We know that you weren't going to visit the hospital last night." Jimmy said. That had been my lie. I told them we couldn't do band practice because I had to visit a relative of Joey's in the hospital. "What do you mean?" I asked. "We mean, Jimmy and I saw Manny go into your house last night." Spinner informed me. I sighed. I didn't want to tell them, especially with Paige and Hazel there. "Look, I know that I lied to you, but I swear I have a good reason," I said. "Enlighten us." Jimmy almost demanded. "I- I- I can't." I told them. "And why not?" Spinner asked. "It's just it something Manny and I would like to keep to ourselves." Spinner wiggled his eyebrows. "I get it, dude." he said. "No, Spinner, not that." I said. "Then what is it, man?" Jimmy asked. Manny walked up right then. "What is what?" she asked. "We're just wondering why our man, Craig here cancelled band practice last night." Spinner told her. She looked a little worried. "Dude, is it that serious?" Jimmy asked. Manny looked at me. "Tell them, if you must, Craig, (_she turned to the rest of them_) BUT, if any of you tell anyone else, I'll kill you, got it?" she questioned. They all nodded. "Okay, Manny thought she might be pregnant, so we needed to check. Okay? Is that a good enough reason to cancel band practice?" Craig asked. They all nodded.  
  
**Hope you like it! Please R&R!**  
  
_Up next... Spinner's POV._


	3. Spinner: You Belong With Me

**DISCLAIMER**: I don't own Degrassi, I own my story and just enjoy the show!!  
  
_Recap_: Craig's point of view on the whole pregnancy scare with Manny.  
  
**(Spinner's POV)**  
  
Whoa! I cannot believe what Craig told us this morning. Jimmy and I were upset because he had to visit some one the day before and cancelled band practice. The thing is, Jimmy and I saw Manny go into his house yesterday. We thought he was blowing us off for her. So we were being jerks this morning and told him what happened. Then he said it was something Manny and him would like to keep between the two of them, well I assumed what any teenage guy would. I told him I got it and wiggled my eyebrows, Paige slapped me playfully on the arm. He said it wasn't that. We asked what it was then. That's when Manny walked up. She told Craig he could tell us, but we couldn't tell anyone else. We agreed. Craig said something that I still can't believe.  
  
You know what he told us? He told us Manny had thought she might have been pregnant, but she isn't. I was shocked when he told us and even more shocked when I saw who was standing behind him, with her mouth hanging open. Take one guess. Yep, that's right, it was Ashley. She immediately took off, to tell Ellie, I figured. I pointed to her and everyone looked. Manny let out a small whimper. Then she started crying. Craig put his arms around her and tried to comfort her, but it didn't work. It actually made her cry harder.  
  
To mine and I think everyone else's surprise, Paige took off after Ashley. She stopped her. I don't know what Paige sad, but Ashley looked even madder, then she took off. Paige cam back and said, "Sorry, I tried." The first bell rang, which signified school would be starting soon. We all went inside, with the exception of Craig and Manny, who decided it would be best to skip today. I totally understand. Craig anf Manny needed to stay away from the rumors that would be swirling around, for awhile.  
  
By lunch I had heard four or five different stories. I couldn't believe some of them, well, I mean, I knew what really happened, but just the nerve of people to make these things up. I heard one about Manny sleeping with some other guy, then Craig, and that she was trying to get Craig to think the baby was his. That's kinda confusing, I know. Another was that she was raped and that Craig just felt bad. That was the hardest one to hear, especially since Paige actually _was_ raped. I knew Manny and Craig would be swarmed on Monday.  
  
I felt bad, but I wanted to focus on my date with Paige tonight. I planned on taking her out to eat, then we'd go to my house and watch a movie. Aren't I sweet? Yeah, I know I am. Well, school went by pretty fast after lunch. After school was over I went to my locker, got my stuff then, went to Paige's locker. It's like she gets beatutifuller every- wait, is 'beautifuller' a word? No, it's more beautiful, isn't it? Yeah, well anyways... she gets more beautiful everytime I see her. And no, that's not some cheesy pick up line, it's true. She has those bright blue- green eyes, long blonde hair, and her glistnening smile, she's just like- what's that one goddess we learned about? Um... well anyways, Paige is like that goddess, the beautiful one. Well after she was ready we walked to her house together, then I went to my house to shower and change.  
  
At 7:30 I was ready to go. I had on this red button down shirt and khaki pants, and if I do say so myelf, I looked hot! I got into the car and headed for Paige's house, stopping to buy some flowers on the way, sweet I know. I pulled into her driveway and got out. I walked up to the door, flowers in hand, and knocked. Dylan answered the door and told me to come in, that Paige would be down in a little bit. He doesn't like me much, I know.  
  
I sat down on the couch and waited. The tv was on, so I took the liberty of watching it. Ugh. Nevermind. Chick show. I still watched it, though. It was some soap opera and all I got out of it was that some chick's pregnancy test had been wrong... uh oh, could Manny's have been wrong, too? I immediately put the thought out of my head. Her's was right, it had to be.  
  
Then I saw Paige coming down the steps, she looked... wow! Beautiful. She had on this pink tank top, with this black ruffled- looking skirt. She looked amazing! I got this goofy grin on my face and she laughed. She finally reached the bottom of the stairs. I walked over to her and greeted her with a, "Hi.", a kiss, and the flowers. She took the flowers and said, "Oh, Honeybee, they're beautiful!" she exclaimed. "Just like you," I told her. Okay, that was kind of a cheesy pick up line. She went and put them in a vase and came back into the living room. "Let's go," I said. "Wait, I gotta put my shoes on," she said. She quickly put them on and we were on our way.  
  
We got to the restaurant and were seated. I tried getting a bottle of champagne, but the waiter asked for ID, Paige told him we'd both like water. When he left Paige said, "Spinner! You're so embarassing! You knew he's ask for ID!" I laughed. "It was worth a try." Paige sighed. We ordered and ate. Once we were done we went back to my house, which was empty, thankfully.  
  
I went upstairs and grabbed the movie, her choice, surprisingly, "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre". I took it downstairs and put it in. I asked Paige if she wanted anything to drink, she nodded and I went into the kitchen. I came back with two glasses of champagne. I handed one to her and she took it. I sat down. "Your parents won't notice it's gone will they?" she worried. "Nah, they don't drink." She responded with, "Oh, then why do you have- SPINNER!" she exclaimed the last part. "What?!" I asked, not knowing what I did wrong. "Did you sneak champagne?" she asked. "No, we have it for like, family get- togethers and stuff." I told her, defending myself. We watched the movie and then soon found ourselves making out, then the movie was over and we must have fallen asleep...  
  
_**Hope you liked it! Spinner's my favorite character, so I loved doing this chapter! Find out what happens after Spin and Paige fell asleep in Paige's POV, I think I'm gonna do either Emma or Paige next, you tell me in the reviews who you think I should do... thanks!**_


	4. Paige: You Make Me Wanna La La

**DISCLAIMER: YOU KNOW THE DRILL, I OWN NOTHING, BUT MY STORIES.  
**  
_Recap: Spinner told us how he felt about Craig and Manny. Also, Spinner and Paige went on a date.  
_  
**(Paige's POV)**

Omigod! Spin is so sweet! For really no reason at all (I mean we haven't even been dating for an even month... 6 months, 2 weeks, and 5 days FYI...) he's taking me out to eat then to his house for movie. OH MY GOD! WAIT... I forgot something else... something very important!  
  
Ok, Manny thought she was pregnant! I was like 'Whoa! Back up!' But I didn't have much time to think, because Spin pointed behind Craig... I looked. I couldn't believe it... it was Ashley, mouth hanging open. She took off running, to tell Ellie, presumably. I don't know why, but I took off after her. I caught up to her and stopped her. "Ashley." I said, almost pleading. "What, Paige?" she asked, annoyed. "Please, Ash, could you, like, not tell anyone?" I begged. "Why?" she demanded. "What if that was you, Ashley, would you want everyone knowing?" I questioned. "Paige, that would never be me. I'm not a slut!" she said, bitterly. "Oh, Ashley, you're just jealous he's with her and not you!" I said, my anger getting the best of me. She gave me this glare then ran away, once again. I walked back to my group of friends. "Sorry, I tried." I stated, feeling bad. That's when the bell rang. School would be starting in ten minutes, so we headed inside, all of us except Manny and Craig who decided to skip today.  
  
The day went by pretty fast. I heard a lot of rumors about Craig and Manny. But, one really hurt me... the rumor was that Manny had been raped and Craig just felt bad for her. That hurt because I _was_ raped. After I heard that one I had to go into the bathroom, I just needed to cry. I went into the bathroom and guess who was there. Yep, Ashley. I looked at her, tears filling my eyes. "YOU DID THIS!" I yelled. That's when I lost it, I just broke down and cried. To my surprise she actually came over to me and tried comforting me. "Look, Paige, I never said that. I never would, no matter how much I hate Manny. That rumor is horrible!" she said. I looked up at her. There were tears in her eyes, too. "Look, Ashley, I'm sorry for what I said this morning." I assured her. "Me too." She replied, then left the bathroom. I straightened myself up and went back to my class, which went by fast, as did the rest of the day.  
  
At the end of the day I walked to my locker and opened it. I put my unneeded books on the shelf and grabbed the ones I did need and shoved them into my bag. That's when Spinner came up. He gave me a quick kiss and smiled. "Let's go," I said, as I closed my locker, which was filled with pictures of Spinner and our friends. We walked home hand-in-hand it was so cute! He dropped me off at my house, then walked to his. I went inside and then upstairs. I hopped in the shower, then went back into my room. I pulled my dresser open, nothing in there. I pulled open my closet doors. Ugh, I looked and finally found a pink tank top, now for the skirt... I looked back in the dresser. I threw my skirts out of my dresser, one-by- one, until I finally found the perfect one, a black ruffled skirt.  
  
I put the outfit on then moved on to hair and makeup. I blow dried my hair, then curled it lightly, so it looked a little wavy. I did my makeup, which was pretty easy-foundation, eyeliner, eye shadow, mascara, lip gloss, and shimmer powder- you know, the basics. I heard the doorbell ring. "DYLAN, ANSWER IT! IT'S SPINNER, TELL HIME I'LL BE DOWN IN A MINUTE." I yelled.  
  
I checked the mirror a few more times, each time finding somwthing wrong. Finally I decided I looked good. I walked down the stairs and saw Spin sitting on the couch, watching a soap opera. He saw me coming down the stairs. He stood up and got this goofy grin on his face. I couldn't help but laugh. He walked over to me. He greeted me with a quick "Hi," a kiss, and handed me some flowers. "Oh, Honeybee, they're beautiful!" I squealed. "Just like you." He said. I know what you're thinking- it's just some cheesy pick- up line, that's what I thought too, but honestly, don't you just love hearing that? That's what I thought. Well, anyways, I went and put the flowers in a vase, put my shoes on, and we were off.  
  
Once at the restaurant, we were seated and we ordered. I got some pasta thingy. Spin, being Spinner, tried getting a bottle of champagne. That's when the waited asked fof ID. "Water, will be just fine!" I said, the waiter left. "Spinner, you're so embarrassing! You knew he'd ask for ID!" I whispered. "It was worth a try," was hi response. We ate and left.  
  
We went back to his house. I sat down on the couch in the living room, while Spinner went and got the movie I had picked, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Why I picked it, I'm not quite sure. I think maybe because hazel told me it was really good, earlier that day ot maybe because I knew if I got scared while I was watching it, Spin would be right there to protect me.  
  
Well, anyways, Spin went and got the movie and put it in. Then he asked me if I wanted anything to drink. I said sure. He cam back with two glasses of champagne. "Your parents won't notice it's gone will they?" I asked. "Nah, they don't drink." He told me. "Oh, then why do you have- SPINNER!" I responded, exclaiming the last part. "What?!" he asked, not aware of why I was yelling. "Did you sneak champagne?" I asked. "No, we have it for like, family get-togethers and stuff." He said. I just said, "Oh." Then we started making out and all too soon the movie was over. That must have been when we fell asleep. The next thing I know, I hear a muffled, "Omigod." That's when I woke up. I was laying on my side, next to Spinner, who had his arm around me, in just a way that it went up my shirt. I sat up. That's when I say Kendra. She was standing in the doorway with Toby, her mouth hanging open. I looked at her. I knew what she was thinking. I shook Spinner. He just grunted. I shook again, harder. "Spin, we have a little problem here, GET UP!" I said. He woke up this time, "What?" He asked, groggily. I pointed to Kendra. He sat up and looked to where I was pointing. "Oh, shit." He muttered.  
  
Kendra ran upstairs, dragging Toby with her. Spinner and I followed her. She and Toby went into her room and she slammed the door. Spin knocked on the door. "Spin, leave me alone." She said. "C'mon, Kendra, atleast give us a chance to explain." Spin begged. "Um, Spin, if you haven't noticed, I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED! AND I'M SURE MOM AND DAD WOULD LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT IT!" she screamed. I decided I should give it a try. "Kendra, please, listen to us. That didn't happen, I swear." I said. "LEAVE ME ALONE!" she yelled again. "Kendra, please..." Spinner said. "No, Spin, your hand was up her shirt, you obviously did something last night." She said, hastily. "KENDRA! How could you even think that?" Spinner yelled. "It's pretty obvious!" she screamed back. "Kendra, c'mon, just open the door." He pleaded. "NO!" she yelled back. Spin looked at me and frowned, then his face turned angry. "Wait a minute. What the hell is Toby doing here?" he yelled, angry. "I- we- we- we were just going to work on a project." Toby said. "Uh huh." Spinner said, suspiciously. "WE WERE, _GAVIN!"_ she yelled, knowing he hated being called by his real name. "See, here's the stuff," she said, quickly opening her door and throwing out a bag of paint, card board, paint brushes, modeling clay, and stuff like that.  
  
**_I hope you like it! R & R please! Tell me who's POV I should do next... Ashley or Emma._**

**_Thanks, -Shelby-_**


	5. Shelby: Author's Note

**_Author's Note  
_**  
Hey guys,  
  
Sorry about not updating very quickly lately. We're in the process of moving, we actually start moving tomorrow. Our internet won't be connected in our new house until next week, sometime. I will try to update as soon as possible, probably starting off with my Degrassi story, _Today We're Thinking About_ or my One Tree Hill/ The O.C.,_ East Meets West_. I'm not sure, but thanks for being patient. Have a nice weekend,  
  
Your's Truly,  
  
The Author,  
  
**_×Shelby_**


	6. Emma: You Think You Know Me

**DISCLAIMER: SEE PREVIOS CHAPTERS.**

_Recap: Paige and Spinner went on a date. Paige and Spinner went to Spinner's house. Paige and Spinner fell asleep. Kendra and Toby found them. lol it was all paired up in that chapter :)_

A/N: I am so glad we are finally moved in! Okay, well, here's my new update. I was already started on Ashley for this chapter, but then I started writing for Emma, instead, I think I have an idea for Ashley and Ellie in another chapter. Oh, and since school is starting soon, I am going to delay writing on at least two of my stories, so I can get focused on school first and foremost lol... But this story is definitely NOT one that I am going to delay; I am having a great time writing this one! Please keep reviewing! Thanks!

**(Emma's POV)**

As shocking as it may be, I am almost surprised by what Manny told me. I mean, in my mind it has been a possibility since she changed her image awhile back. She is- ok, was... the school slut. But, I should stop my rambling and tell you what the heck is going on...

Manny told me, yesterday, that she thought she might be pregnant. She said she'd be about two months pregnant, is she was. I already knew this, I mean, best friends tell each other everything. But I guess it was just a false alarm. Thank God! Well, she came to school today, but I guess they were telling Craig's friends what happened, when Ashley walked up and heard what happened. According to JT (I guess Paige told him), Paige went after Ashley and they exchanged a few harsh words, then Ashley took off once again. So now the whole school knows. Well, Manny and Craig decided to skip school today.

So when lunchtime rolled around I decided I should call her. I found a pay phone that wasn't being used and inserted money. I dialed Manny's number and waited for her to answer.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Manny?" I asked.

"Yeah." She said

"How are you?" I asked.

"Fine. Tired and nauseous, but not horrible," she replied sounding a little weak.

"Um... Manny, do you think you actually _might be_ pregnant? I mean those tests aren't always right, you know?" I said, worried.

"I don't know Emma, I mean, I hope it was right, but you're right... the test could've been wrong... I just hope it wasn't," she said, sounding like she might cry.

"I know... I hope it was right, too. So is Craig there with you?" I questioned.

"No... he came here for a little while, but he's kinda in trouble with Joey at the moment... Joey found the pregnancy test... so Craig's in huge trouble for that. So he has to pretend to be sick... you know what I mean?" she asked, kind of joking.

"Yeah," I said.

"Will you come over after school please? I need some company..." she sighed.

"Yeah, but, hey, I gotta go now, I'll talk to you later. Okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'll talk to you later then. Bye," she said.

"Buh bye," I said back.

I hung up, only to see Sean Cameron waiting in line behind me. I tried walking away, but he grabbed my arm and turned me around.

"What, Sean?" I asked, annoyed.

"Look, I just wanted to know if she is okay," he said.

"She's upset... but you know _she has reason to be_," I spat back, my voice more harsh then I really wanted it to be.

"Emma, what's _your problem_ lately?" he questioned.

"Okay, Sean, you want the run down of my problems? Okay, I'll give it to you. A few months ago I thought I had the perfect boyfriend, I thought I loved him, I thought he loved me, I thought he was the one, but then he goes and blows it all, just so he can go hang out with a "cooler" group of friends. My step dad was diagnosed with cancer. Then the boy went and stole my dad's new laptop, which my dad liked very much. But now that boy has a new girlfriend, and here I am alone and boyfriend-less, because I can't seem to get over him. And now, to top it all off, my best friend could very possibly be pregnant by another friend. Does that give you an idea of what my problem is?" I replied, my tone very harsh now.

I could see the hurt in Sean's eyes. He knew the majority of this story was about him. It was pretty obvious.

"Look, Emma, I know I hurt you, I don't know if you'll ever forgive me, but I want you to know I'm sorry. Okay? I want you to know that. And just so you know... Ellie and I broke up today. You wanna know why? Cause when I'm with her I can only think of you. I can't stop thinking about you... ever," he said.

I didn't know what to do... I was speechless... what do you say when someone tells you that they broke up with their girlfriend for you? When they tell you, that you're all they think about? I did the only thing I could think of. I kissed him. Not like a little kiss... like a long passionate kiss. Once the kiss was over, I realized what I was doing.

"Sean, I'm sorry," I said.

"For what, Emma? I've been wishin' I could do that ever since we broke up," he said.

I knew that I'd wanted to do that for awhile too, but I mean, he hasn't even been single for a whole day.

"Yeah, but it's too soon, Sean," I replied.

_HOPE YOU LIKED IT! Thanks for your patience. I should have more up soon! Well, keep reviewing... Now do you wanna find out what happens with Sean and Emma, with Sean's POV or do you wanna see what happens with Ashley and Ellie, with Ashley's POV? Review! Thanks..._

**...Shelby...**


	7. Sean: Word on the Street is That You Do

**DISCLAIMER: See previous chapters.**

_Recap: Well Sean and Emma kissed, but is it really too soon? (Emma's POV)_

* * *

**(Sean's POV)**

"... is pregnant, isn't that insane?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said, Manny was pregnant, as in Emma's Manny? The Manny that used to constantly tag along with Emma and I? Emma's best friend? Emma... why is she all I think about? You need to do it, Sean, I told myself. I can't. "Ellie... I uh..."

"Yeah?" she questioned.

"I... I... I think... that we... you know... need... some... time apart...?" I said, not meaning for it to be a question.

Her expression was blank. "I... don't... think that... Sean," she sobbed.

"Look, Ellie, I'm sorry, but I think it's only fair to you..." I trailed off.

"Fair to me? Fair to me, Sean? How is this fair to me?" she cried.

"Ellie, seriously, it's for the best," I replied.

"It's Emma, isn't it? You still love her," she said, wiping her eyes.

"Ellie, I just... I don't know... I'm not sure, that's why we need to do this... take a little break until I figure things out," I said.

"Yeah, whatever, Sean," she said, bitterly and she walked away, her eyes full of tears. I didn't really want to do it. I just had to. I thought what I was doing was best for Ellie. I'm always thinking about Emma. I stood there, watching Ellie walk away. I stood there, for what seemed like hours before I finally grabbed my bag and headed for MI. Once there I took my seat and sat there, looking at Simpson, but not really listening. When he was done talking I turned back to my computer and made it look like I was working. Really, I walk thinking about Emma. Finally the bell rang and I headed back to my locker for my English book. When I opened my locker I found a note... from Ashley. I grabbed it and slipped it in my English book.

During English, while Mrs. Kwan was talking I quietly opened the note and read it.

_Sean,_

_You ass! How could u do that to Ellie? I know u mite alwayz think about Emma, or whatever, but I mean, didn't u no that at the beginning of ur relationship w/ Ellie? Couldn't u have brokn up with her b4 you guys got so close? U no... I think she really luved u. But, I can't exactly be mad u... she may b sad now, but she's been the happiest I've ever seen her. So I guess maybe u did the right thing by breaking up with her... I'm not sure... she loved u, but if ur only thinkin about Emma when ur with her... then maybe u did... I don't know... I'm even kinda confused by my point of view here, but atleast u didn't pull a Craig... okay, maybe I'm happy u broke up with her now... and no... that's not a joke... well, that's all for now..._

_Ciao,_

_×Ashley_

I read it again and again... I know I'd made Ellie happy, but I just couldn't keep going on like this... you know? I'm so confused...

Then my thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of the bell... damn that thing. Oh, well. I got up and slung my bag over my shoulder once more and headed down to lunch. On my way down I saw Emma talking on a pay phone. I decided I should try and talk to her... pretend like I have to use the phone and accidentally bump into her. _That could work, right?_

I stood in line behind her and waited, digging in my pocket for change.

"... so is Craig there with you?" Emma asked into the phone.

Emma laughed a little. _I love how she laughs._

"Yeah," Emma said.

Pause.

"Yeah, but, hey, I gotta go now, I'll talk to you later. Okay?" Emma questioned.

"Buh bye," Emma replied into the phone.

Emma turned around to face me, rolled her eyes, and tried walking away, but I caught her by the arm and stopped her.

"What, Sean?!" She asked, very annoyed.

"Is she okay?" I questioned, that being the first thing to come to my mind.

"She's upset, but she has reason to be," she responded, her tone very harsh.

"Emma, what's your problem?" I asked. _SEAN! You dumbass! Don't get her any more mad at you!_

"Okay, Sean, you want the run down of my problems? Okay, I'll give it to you. A few months ago I thought I had the perfect boyfriend, I thought I loved him, I thought he loved me, I thought he was the one, but then he goes and blows it all, just so he can go hang out with a "cooler" group of friends. My step dad was diagnosed with cancer. Then the boy went and stole my dad's new laptop, which my dad liked very much. But now that boy has a new girlfriend, and here I am alone and boyfriend-less, because I can't seem to get over him. And now, to top it all off, my best friend could very possibly be pregnant by another friend. Does that give you an idea of what my problem is?" she finished.

_Ouch. When did Emma become such a bitch? Oh, yeah, probably when I did all that stupid crap to her._

"Look, Emma, I know I hurt you, I don't know if you'll ever forgive me, but I want you to know I'm sorry. Okay? I want you to know that. And just so you know... Ellie and I broke up today. You wanna know why? Cause when I'm with her I can only think of you. I can't stop thinking about you... ever," I replied, begging for her forgiveness.

She just stood there for a few seconds, then she kissed me, and I, of course kissed here, **the girl of my dreams** back. Then the kiss ended. Her expression changed, to worry.

"Sean, I am so sorry," she said.

"For what, Emma, I've been wishin' I could do that since we broke up!" I exclaimed, in disbelief of her reaction.

"Yeah, but it's just too soon, Sean," she replied.

"Too soon... too soon for what? For us? No... no, Emma, it is not too soon for us. You wanna know why? Because "us" should still be together. "Us" shouldn't be ashamed of this. I still have feelings for you... do you feel the same?" I paused for her answer. Her eyes were watering. Then, after what seemed like an eternity, she nodded. "Then whay are you sorry?" I once again paused. "See, you're not. You enjoyed that kiss as much as I did. Didn't you?" I asked.

Emma once again nodded. "I love you, Sean," she said.

_I love you, too, I thought._ I opened my mouth, but no words came out. _C'mon, Sean_.

"I love you, too," I replied, "can I kiss you, then?"

_Please?_

"Oh, I don't know, whaddya give me for it?" she joked.

"Probably that kiss, followed by another one," I replied, playing along with her joke.

Then we kissed, again, but this one was even better then the first one. We only stopped kissing to take a breath, then we kissed again. But, as if on cue, the bell rang. _Seriously, someone needs to shut that thing off._ I gave one more parting kiss, then we went our seperate ways to class.

* * *

**_A/N: Hey guys, hope you like the new chapter! I am the biggest Sean/ Emma fan, so there was no way in hell that I was going to let this be a Sean/ Ellie story. Well, I officially don't like this system. Two of my stories have been removed for no reason... I don't know why. As for the title of this chapter and the last one... damn that Ashlee Simpson. lol ;) Well a note to the reviewers:_**

**FusionSpark12:** I know, she isn't necissarily the school slut, but it does make for a more interesting story. BUT I am still not sure if I want her pregnant or not. Send your ideas in your review if you have, cause I love suggestions!

**rollinx3:** Thank you! I'm so glad you love it! lol, now you don't have to roll on the floor and cry! ;)

**turquoisetears91:** Thanks for the suggestion! Your wish is my command! lol, Sean and Emma are my favorite couple (aside from Spinner and Paige) also.

_**Well, thanks, to everyone who reviewed! Please r/r! Thanks a bunch! Also: Don't forget to watch Degrassi: Unscripted Friday at 8 (if you live in the U.S.), because after watching it, I am totally jealous of Miriam's shoe collection AND that hug Shane gave her. :( lol Great taste in music, too. Oh, that reminds me... music junkies in the U.S. don't forget the VMA's tonight on MTV at 8/7 c! Thanks, I swear I'm done now! lol Ciao,**_

**_Shelby_**


	8. Ellie: This World This World is Cold

**Disclaimer: See previous chapters... "Hold On" is owned by Good Charlotte, also.**

_Recap: Sean broke up with Ellie. It isn't too soon for Sean and Emma._

**(Ellie's POV):  
**_Chapter Title: This world/ This world is cold/ but you don't/ you don't have to go/ your mother's gone and your father hits you/ this pain you cannot bare. _

"...and they thought she was pregnant! Can you believe that?!" Ash exclaimed, furiated.

"That's horrible, but Ash, she's a slut, what can you say?" I asked.

"Yeah. That's true," she replied.

"Hey, I'm gonna go talk to Sean, okay?" I questioned.

"Yeah, sure," she responded.

I trucked down the hall until I reached Sean's locker.

"Hey you," I said, pulling him into a kiss.

"Ahem."

We looked up and there stodd Raditch, himself.

"No PDA in the hall... please," he said simply, before walking away.

"Well, that was embarassing," I laughed, I could feel my face getting hot.

"It's not the worst thing," Sean joked.

"Omigod! Guess what?" I said, suddenly remembering why I was here.

"Um... let me see... you're going to that concert this weekend?" he guessed. _There was a local band called "The Whatstheirfaces" playing this weekend that I wanted to see, but of course, I have to help mom around the house._

"No, but... Ashley went to talk to Paige about changing the lyrics on one of our new songs, and Manny and Craig were standing there, saying that Manny is pregnant... isn't that insane?" I asked.

"Yeah," he added. There was a pause for a minute. Sean tugged at the bottom of his shirt, it was his nervous habit, I had noticed. "Ellie... I uh..."

"Yeah?" I questioned.

"I... I... I think... that we... you know... need... some... time apart...?" he replied.

_Wait... what?_

"I... don't... think that... Sean," I sobbed

_Ellie, don't cry, don't cry. Act tough. You're tough. You can do this. But I couldn't, I could feel the tears coming._

"Look, Ellie, I'm sorry, but I think it's only fair to you..." he trailed off.

_What? Is this reverse psycology or some crazy shit?_

"Fair to me? Fair to me, Sean? how is this fair to me?" I asked, the tears reflecting in my voice.

"Ellie, seriously, it's for the best," he responded.

_It's her. My worst fear has come true... he's dumping me for her... that perfect, prude, little Emma._

"It's _Emma_, isn't it? You still love her," I guessed, removing the tears from my eyes.

"Ellie, I just... I don't know... I'm not sure, that's why we need to do this... take a little break until I figure things out," he said, sounding a little confused, himself.

_How could you do this to me?!_

"Yeah, whatever, Sean," I replied, coldly, my eyes about to explode with tears.

_I headed for my locker. I threw some books into my bag and was about to head to class when Ashley approached me._

"Elle, what's wrong?" she asked, concerned.

"It's nothing," I told her.

"Ellie, I have never once seen you cry... this is something," she retorted.

"He- he- he broke up with me," I stuttered.

She gasped, "Ellie, that's horrible." She pulled me into a small hug.

"I know, Ash, I- I- I loved him-" I trailed off.

Then the bell rang.

"Elle, is it okay if I head to class? I swear I'll meet you here after class, okay?" she asked.

"Yeah," I answered.

She took off down the hall. I grabbed my bag and headed for the bathroom, which was, conveniently, located near my locker. I checked to see if the stalls were empty- which they were. And then I went into a stall and locked it, I couldn't risk anyone finding me. I laid my bag down and sat on the toilet. I opened the bag and pulled out the small, shiny object that had been upon my skin many times.

_Don't do it, Ellie, snap the rubber band. But I couldn't... the rubber band didn't take away the pain as much as the razor did._

So I slowly rolled up my sleeve. I put the razor near my wrist, and was about to dig into when I heard someone burst into the bathroom.

"ELLIE! **DON'T YOU DARE DO IT!**"

I quickly hid the razor in my pocket and opened the stall door. There stood Ash.

"Do what, Ash?" I asked innocently, though I knew exactly what she meant.

"You know what I mean, Ellie!" She exclaimed, pretty mad.

"Ash, I wasn't gonna... well, you know..." I lied.

"Ellie! Don't lie! I know you were gonna," she replied.

"No, I wasn't!" I yelled.

"Then why is your sleeve rolled up? And why is there a razor sticking out of your pocket?" she questioned.

"Ash, I couldn't help it, the pain was too much, I loved him for Christ's sake, why doesn't her understand?" I screamed.

"Ellie, you know that saying, 'Let them go, and if they come back, you're meant to be?'" she asked.

"Yeah, but-" I said.

"'Yeah, but' nothing, let him go, maybe he just needs some time," she responded.

"He left me for her," I said.

"Ellie, he's confused. I was too, after- well, after Craig did what he did, but he needs sometime," she started, "give him time. He'll come back around, eventually. You guys had so much fun, remember how upset he was when he thought he had to leave you to go to Alberta?"

I nodded.

"See, if he didn't love you, he wouldn't have been upset, get it?" she asked.

"Yeah," I told her.

"Ellie, you can't keep doing this to yourself, no matter how upset you are. Okay?" she questioned.

"I know, but sometimes I get caught in my moment of pain. My mind's not working, you know?" I asked.

"I know, Ellie," she replied. "Remember, 'Hold on/ if you feel like letting go/ hold on/ it feels better then you know.'"

_"Hold On," by Good Charlotte... that was kind of Ashley's way of telling me not to cut. That was the first thing she said when she found out about me cutting._

I started crying, again.

"I'll try, Ash, I promise... I'll try," I said between sobs.

**_Hey guys,_**

**_This is one of the hardest chapters to write. I really love Ellie as a character, but it was hard for me to get inside her head. This is probably also, one of the deepest chapters I've written. Well, anyways R/R. Oh, and check out Teen People's new issue, the girls of Degrassi are in there, showing off make up, and I must say, Stacy looks quite different without all the Ellie make up, but they're all very pretty._**

**_Ciao,_**

**_Shelby_**


	9. Shelby: Another Author's Note

Quick Author's Note...

Hey guys, I am seriously sorry about not updating! I have the next few chapters of both stories written in a notebook, but I haven't had enough time to type them out, they will be up ASAP, but I didn't want you guys to think I was neglecting my stories or anything... I just have a lot of homework, but like I said, I will have the next chapters up as soon as I can. Deepest sympathy,

Ciao,

The Author,

×Shelby


	10. Ashley Pt I: Hold on If you feel like le...

**Disclaimer: I own nothing of Degrassi... I do, however, own lots of CD's, but I don't own the bands or songs themselves... got it?**

_Recap: Ellie got dumped. She was gonna cut, but Ashley stopped her._

* * *

**(Ashley's POV)**

"...thought she was pregnant," he finished.

_What the hell? Craig got her pregnant?!_

Before I had time to clearly process it Spinner nodded towards me, and I started running... I knew I wasn't supposed to hear that, I wasn't in their little group of "friends." I wasn't in the know or anything.

"Ash!" a voice called from behind me. It was Paige.

"What, Paige?" I asked.

"Please, Ash, could you like not tell anyone?" she asked innocently.

"Why?!" I questioned.

_It was Manny's fault for being easy... not mine._

"What if that was you, Ashley, would you want everyone knowing?" she shot back.

_Ha. Me pregnant, in high school, yeah right._

"Paige, that would never be me, I am not a slut!" I yelled back.

"Oh, Ashley, you're just jealous he's with her and not you!" she screamed at me.

_You bitch._

I just turned and walked away. Then I went to find Ellie. She was at her locker.

So I told her the story.

"She's a slut, what do you expect?" she asked me.

"Yeah, that's true."

_What did I expect. When we broke up Craig called me a prude... am I? Or is it just that I won't give him any?_

"Hey, I'm gonna go talk to Sean, okay?"

"Yeah, sure," I replied.

I hated this, she always left me to talk to Sean. I don't know what she saw in him... honestly I don't. In my opinion he's a good for nothing piece of, well you know.

I hastily threw the last of what I needed into my bag and flung it over my shoulder. I walked towards Ellie's locker. About half way there JT stopped me. I turned around.

"What. JT?" I asked, kinda annoyed, but I have to admit,_ JT is starting to completely transform... he's not that dork who always used to hang out with my stepbrother... now he's older, more mature (okay... maybe not mature, but...), and he's starting to get kinda hot._

"Ash, do you think you could like not tell anybody about," he lowered his voice, "Manny?"

"Why shouldn't I? Give me one good reason I shouldn't give everybody proof that she's a slut?" I stammered.

"Ash, come on, please, she's not a slut, she's just a little---------- adventurous?" he explained.

_Adventurous? I had to laugh._

"Ok, JT, whatever you say. Plus, why would I want to tell everybody about MANNY BEING PREGNANT?" I said, yelling the las part, it caused half the hall to stop and look at me and the other half to turn their heads toward me. This was probably the most attention I've gotten in this school since Rock N Roll High or since I slapped Craig during the winter talent show.

_Am I really that cruel?!_ I asked myself.

I turned and walked away as guilt consumed me. I found Ellie by her locker, but she was crying.

_OH, God, what is it?_

"Elle, what's wrong?" I asked, genuinely concerned for my friend.

"It's nothing," she replied, immediately.

"Ellie, I have never once seen you cry... this is something," I scolded.

"He- he- he broke up with me," she sobbed.

"Ellie, that's horrible," I gasped. Then I did the only thing I could think of, I hugged her.

"I know, Ash, I- I- I- loved him," she cried.

Then the bell rang. _I didn't want to leave her there, but I had to._

"I'm gonna go to class... okay?" I asked, feeling pretty crappy for doing so.

"Yeah. Sure." she replied. I could tell she was upset, but I had to.

I turned and walked toward English. But I turned to look back at Ellie, that's when i saw she wasn't there.

_Oh, God._

The bathroom door was swinging closed.

_She's gonna do it!_

I ran back down the hall. I ran through the door.

"ELLIE, DON'T DO IT!!" I screamed.

I heard shuffling in the first saw, then she came out, bag in hand.

"Do what, Ash?" she asked, trying to act innocent.

"You know what I mean." I stated.

"Ash, I wasn't going to... well you know..." she trailed off.

"Ellie, don't lie, I know you were gonna," I screamed.

"No, I wasn't!" she yelled back.

"Then why is your sleeve rolled up and there's a razor sticking out of your pocket?" I questioned, my voice a little smart ass-y.  
  
"Ash, I couldn't help it, the pain was too much, I loved him for Christ's sake, why doesn't her understand?" she screamed.  
  
"Ellie, you know that saying, 'Let them go, and if they come back, you're meant to be?'" I asked.  
  
"Yeah, but-" she said.  
  
"'Yeah, but' nothing, let him go, maybe he just needs some time," I responded.  
  
"He left me for her," she said.  
  
"Ellie, he's confused. I was too, after- well, after Craig did what he did, but he needs sometime," I started, "give him time. He'll come back around, eventually. You guys had so much fun, remember how upset he was when he thought he had to leave you to go to Alberta?"

She nodded.

"See, if he didn't love you, then why would he be upset? Get it?" I backed up me point.

"Yeah," she said.

"Ellie, you can't keep doing this to yourself, no matter how upset you are," I worried.

"I know, but sometimes I get caught up in my moment of pain."

"I know, Ellie, but remember... 'Hold on/ If you feel like letting go/ Hold on/ It feels better then you know,'" I sang.

_That was my song for her... that was my perspective... she needed to hold on and not let go, she needs to deal with pain in a more healthy way._

She started crying.

"I'll try, Ash, I promise, I'll try," she said between intrevals of sobs.

I sat in the bathroom until she was finally calmed down enough to go to class, which had already started, but I wasn't too worried.

My morning classes went by pretty fast, but every once in a while I heard the occasional (okay, so it was all the time and there were tons) of rumors. Finally, right before lunch I heard the one that made me regret 100 what I had done.

The rumor was that Manny was raped, and that Craig just felt bad for her. Having been Paige's friends for nearly seven years, I took that hard. Paige was raped. And taking the guy to court later this year.

At lunch I had to go to the bathroom, so I went into the bathroom, did my business, and as I was washing my hands Paige came in. She had tear filling her eyes.

"YOU DID THIS!!" she yelled.

Then she broke down and cried, lng and hard crying.

"Look, Paige, I never said that. I would never, no matter how much I hate Manny. That rumor is horrible!" I tried comforting her.

"Look, Ashley, I'm sorry for what I said this morning," she said after a few minutes.

"Me too." I said, I left. I had to, I couldn't stand to see her cry.

* * *

**_Hey guys... Here's the deal, Ashley's chapter is really long because I had a lot of ideas for her, all of which are necessary for what I have planned out in the next few chapters, so I'm cutting it into two parts. Hope your like it. Please, read and review.  
Ciao,  
Shelby_**


	11. Ashley Pt 2: I want you and your beautif...

_Disclaimer: I own nothing but my story, Jake Gyllenhaal, and Degrassi: The Next Generation- Season One on DVD. Okay, okay, I only the my story, The Day After Tomorrow, and Degrassi: THe Next Generation- Season One on DVD. Don't sue me... I just love the show. Oh, and I stole a line from Ann Brashar's Second Summer of the Sisterhood. Still, don't sue._

**Recap: We reviewed most of what we already knew, through Ashley, who is directly involved in most of this story.

* * *

**

_Here comes part 2..._

**(Ashley's POV)**

_Ellie and I talked about... about the party, tonight I mean. She said she could probably go, so that's totally awesome._

But, I still couldn't get over the fact that my little outburst in the hall caused Paige to be hurt, sure, she's not my best friend, but she certainly doesn't deserve that, especially now, after just losing the case against Dean. I feel horrible and no party was going to stop that fact. I held my head high, pretending, pretending everything was cool, pretending I wasn't hurt, pretending I don't love Craig, still, pretending I didn't feel like a bitch, pretending... that seems to be all high school is. You have to pretend to fit in, you have to pretend to be skinny, you have to pretend to have lots of friends, pretend your a slut, pretend to be okay with that cheating ex-boyfriend.

_But, oh, well... when I thought about the party it made me feel a little better knowing that in a matter of a few hours I could drink away all the problems, well not drink them away, but atleast get them off my mind for awhile._

School, as always when something fun is happening later, went by very slowly today. I sat there, not learning, nor taking in anything Mrs. Kwan or any of the other teachers were saying. But finally the last bell rang.

_What a relief._

I walked with Ellie to her house. We watched TV for a while and finally at 6:00 we started getting ready. I just basically touched up my make up and fixed up my hair, but when I turned around I was facing a completely different Ellie. She looked drastically different, but at the same time, still kinda the same, you know? She had on this... well, "showy" outfit. And by showy I mean, there wasn't much to it. Not typical Ellie- wear. I didn't say anything... I didn't want to hurt her anymore then she already has been.

"How is it?" she asked.

I looked the outfit over once more... it was a short, short black skirt with safety pins down both sides and this top, it was red and it didn't cover more then half of her upper half.

"It's really... cute," I lied.

"Wow, I didn't know if you'd like it. I was going to wear it on Sean and I's next date... but..." she trailed off.

"Stop right there. Don't think about him. Okay?"

"Okay, Ash."

We finished getting ready. Once we were done we headed downstairs and out the door, Ellie not even bothering to leave a note or even tell her mom where we were going.

_AT THE PARTY_

Ellie immediately ran off to get us some drinks, but after she didn't come back after about 20 minutes I figured she'd probably found a rebound guy or something, so I went off in search of my own drink. I finally found my way to the kitchen. There I found a bunch of plastic cups filled with beer and half sober people grabbing at them. I took one and found my way back into the living room and sat down on the couch. I listened to the loud music that was thumping from the speaker next to me. I sat there, the lyrics puring into my head. Then I felt the couch sink in next to me, distracting me from my thoughts. I looked over. It was Craig. I wanted to plant my feet firmly on the ground and walk away, but I couldn't move.

"What do you want, Craig?" I asked, snottily.

"Who says I want something?" he shot back, innocently enough, but I still didn't believe him.

"Well, if you didn't want something how come you could have sat in that seat right over there?" I questioned, pointing to a empty seat on a sofa across the room.

"Um... Ash, I didn't really want to sit next to those people," he said, pointing to the left side of the couch, where two random people I'd never seen before were making out.

"Oh."

"Okay, that's a lie. Well, I mean I really wouldn't want to sit by them, but the reason I sat here was because I wanted to be next to you... again," he said, making my heart beat faster.

"Well, I don't think your little _pregnant, slut of a girlfriend_ would like that," I told him, my voice harsh.

"Ash, please listen, number one, she's not a _slut_. Number two, she's not _pregnant._ Number three, she's not my _girlfriend_."

_What the hell?! Since when?!_

"Huh, since when?" I asked, coldly.

"I don't know, about seven o' clock," he stated matter-of-factly.

"That's too bad, but don't think I'm going to comfort you," I said, my voice getting sharper with each word.

"Okay, Ashley, look, I know you might never forgive me, but I'm sorry. I regret every minute of what I did to you, every second I made you suffer. Trust me, loosing you has hurt me so bad, I can't even imagine how bad it hurt you. I'm sorry," he apologized.

_It's okay._

"Gee, Craig, you say that, but that doesn't mean it takes away the pain. It doesn't do anything," I replied, trying to sound as smartass-y as I could.

"Ash, will you please listen for a sec?" he begged.

"Fine," I said.

"I just have to get this out," he told me. _Then do you know what he did?! He kissed me. ANd you know what I did. I kissed him back._

"Ash, I'm sorry," he apologized.

"Don't be, please, don't be," I ordered.

"Ok, 'cause honestly I didn't want to be," he assured me.

"I love you, Craig," I said.

_I held my breath and waited for his reply. Did I really just say that?!_

"I love you," he paused, "I never stopped."

* * *

_**Hey guys,  
Hope you enjoyed this chapter, I know for Secret Keepers (Craig/ Manny) fans, that probably sucked, but I am a total shipper of the Angsty Artists (Craig/ Ashley). Sorry, if you hate it. Please R/R. Thanks,  
Shelby**_

_A note to the reviewers...  
_**The Vampire Illiana:** _Wow, thank you so much, I am honored to be your favorite Degrassi author. Shelby prays you're not a Secret Keeper fan ;)  
_**XxXCocoPuffXxX: **_I'm not sure on what exactly I'm going to do with this Sean/ Emma/ Ellie mess I've gotten myself into, but I have to tell you I'm personally a Heartbreaker (Sean/ Emma) fan, but I don't hate Sean/ Ellie stories, so they may get back together.  
_**lilginger5138: **_I'm glad you like it. When I first started it I thought the different POV's would be kinda interesting.  
_**Thanks to all of you. Please, keep up the reviews.**


	12. Shelby: Author's Note III

Author's Note #3

Hello everyone.

I know I haven't updated in, like, forever and, trust me, I feel really guilty, but I've been on kind of a writer's block towards this story and keep thinking up all of these Emma/ Jay plots. Please forgive me. I will have the new chapter up as soon as I can finish it... it's probably gonna be a two chapter things, because JT has a huge part in the plot. Again, I am sorry.

Buh bye,  
Shelby


	13. JT: Bottled up is where my fears go

**Diclaimer:** As always... I own nothing, except my story.

**Recap:** Ashley and Craig got back together at a party.

_Bottled up is where my fears go, my fears go._

**JT's POV**

The news hit me like a thousand bullets. She was pregnant. How could this happen? When Craig and Manny broke up the first time I was almost positive I had a shot with her. I was wrong. They got back together and now this was happening. I loved Manny, not that I was in love with her. I love her as a friend, but I've crushed on her for years. I could only imagine what she was going through now. I knew after this Craig would probably dump her. To me, he's always been a selfish bastard.

I heard about Manny at about 8:34.

**FLASHBACK**

Paige and I were walking down the hall together, like we did every morning. She had English with Mrs. Kwan first and I had Math with Mr. Armstrong, which are at the same end of the school.

"So I guess you heard?" Paige said out of the blue.

"Heard what?" I asked.

"About Manny..."

"No, what about her?"

"Well, she's pregnant."

I stopped dead in my tracks. Did Paige really just say _that_?

**END OF FLASHBACK**

When I heard the news I felt all hope of ever being with Manny drain from me... almost like it fell out of me and hit the ground and broke, broke into a million pieces. If Manny was pregnant, and Craig dumped her, like I figured he would, I knew she would have no time for _me_... _or a boyfriend period_.

I knew that Ashley knew. I knew she was mad at Craig. And I knew she'd tell the whole school. So I had to approach her for Manny's sake. But, I think... ok, I know I made it worse... a lot worse. I don't really feel like mentioning what happened.

I sat in my classes today... not doing a single thing. I didn't take notes, I didn't hand in homework, I didn't raise my hand, I didn't listen. None of my teachers noticed... that is, until I got to Media Immersion. I was staring blankly at the screen, when Mr. Simpson came over to where I was sitting.

"JT, you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just a little out of it."

He looked at me, with a knowing kind of look. Then in a whisper he said: "JT, I know about Manny. And I don't mean to be personal, but I kind of get a vibe that you like her."

I looked at him, surpised. I thought Toby and Emma were the only one's who knew that I liked Manny.

"How- how did you know?" I asked him.

"When you've been around the same students everyday for almost four years, you get to know what they're like and who they hang out with and who they like," he explained.

I looked at him, again.

"I just don't know what to do... I really like her. And I know how Craig is..."

"JT, you can't know how anyone is all of the time. You can only know how they act around you," he explained.

I half-smiled. "Thanks, Mr. Simpson."

He nodded and got back to teaching.

I knew he was right. I didn't know how Craig treated Manny. But, I still had a grave feeling he'd dump her.

I left Media Immersion and headed for science. I had 60 minutes until freedom. Mrs. H. droned on... the information she was drilling into our heads was useless... why would I need to know about the _nitrogen cycle_? Finally the last bell of the day sounded. I solemnly dumped my books into my locker and grabbed my bag. I walked home, with my head hung low. I walked in the front door, Mom was laying on the couch. I shut the door and I think I startled her.

"Oh, JT, it's you. Uh... some girl called... she said her name was... M- _something_," she said.

"_Manny_?" I asked, my excitement building.

"Yeah, that's it!" she exclaimed.

"Ok, thanks, Mom," I replied.

I ran into my room and grabbed the phone. I dialed Manny's number... I'd known it by heart since grade seven.

It rang about six times, then a machine picked up.

"Hello, you've reached the Santoses'. We're not here right now, please leave your name and number and we'll get back to you, thanks." **Beep**.

"Hey, Manny, it's JT. My mom said you called... uh... call me back when you get this message. Bye."

I hung up. I had nothing to do now. So, I did what any kid would have done... I turned on the TV, I didn't pay attention, I kept thinking about Manny. I guess I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew it was getting dark outside. I leaped out of bed and ran into the living room.

"Mom, has Manny called back?" I asked.

She shook her head no.

The disappointment was almost unbearable. Then I had an idea.

"Mom, I'm going out. I'll be back by," I looked at the time: 8:12, "10:00 or so."

"Ok."

I grabbed my coat and walked out the door. Manny's house was about six blocks from mine. I ran most of the way and by the time I got there I was out of breath, my side hurt and I was panting like a maniac. I had to take a few minutes to catch my breath, then I walked up to the porch. I knocked. I felt really nervous. Then someone opened it.

"JT?" It was her.

"I love you," I said. Then I realized what I'd just let slip.

"W-what?" she asked.

"I said I love you." I was nervous. This had not been part of the plan.

She looked shocked, then she put her arms around me.

"I'm sorry. I know, you and Craig... you're-"

She took her arms from around my neck and looked me straight in the eye.

"I'm not, I'm not pregnant. And Craig... he... he- borke up with me."

I had been right. I'd seen it coming. I was relieved that she wasn't pregnant.

"I'm sorry," I apologized.

"Don't be. Craig was kind of an ass. I kind of wanted to break up, but I couldn't because I was pretty sure I was pregnant, and I knew I couldn't do it on my own. I don't think I could have done it at all."

I smiled. "I still have an hour and a half before I have to be home... do you want to do something?" I asked her.

She smiled back, "Sure."

She invited me in, while she went upstairs to get ready. I only had about $20 on me, so I figured I'd take her to the Dot. She came down the steps ten minutes later and she looked gorgeous. Her long, black hair was pulled into a loose ponytail and she had little pieces of hair hanging near her face.

"You look beautiful," I told her.

"Thanks," she blushed.

I laughed. I wanted to tell her so bad what had happened with Emma today...

_Hey guys,  
Sorry it's been so long! I feel so bad! But here's the new chapter and I've set it up for a second, shorter JT chapter. Please R/R and check out my newest story, The Road that Leads to More, which is a EmJay story. Like I said keep up the reviews...  
Thanks,  
_**S**_h_**e**_l_**b**_y_


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